Lessons

Something I am reminded of frequently as I go through my days with a little one is the importance of being flexible. No matter how much planning I might do, no matter how smoothly I may envision something playing out, Aedan invariably has other plans.

We imagine a lovely family portrait lit by the warm rays of the setting sun, but instead, Aedan is crying when we hold him, wanting only to run around on the grass waving a stick.....

I bundle us both up against the cold to take the dogs for a walk on a beautiful, clear afternoon, snuggling him into the pouch of my amauti parka, but for some reason Aedan is terribly uncomfortable on my back, and he cries until I cut the walk short.....

After dinner, I heat kettles of water to give him a nice bedtime bath in front of the wood stove, but after a few minutes in the tub, he begins to cry and lift his arms to me, ready to get out.....

It can be so frustrating to see my plans changed so completely, and at times it's hard not to take it personally.  I think I invest so much in the idea of an activity: how nice it will be to walk in the woods, packing my baby on my back, or give him a bath by the wood stove; I forget sometimes that he is developing his own preferences, and right now crying is the only way he has to voice a difference of opinion.

In the moment, trudging through the woods with a screaming baby on my back (or whatever the situation may be), I remind myself to take deep breaths, to have compassion and empathy for what this little person is feeling, to stay in the moment and not lament what could have or should have been. Because it's not always going to be just as I imagine. Aedan is not me, and he lives very much in the moment. 

I am learning to let go of all expectations, and just let things unfold as they will. When I do this, I end up experiencing some other beauty or joy that I hadn't planned on. 

I never imagined that a baby could teach me so much about life!

All about Aedan

On our way to Ontario, we had a stopover in Vancouver, to check in with our "team" at the B.C. Women and Children's hospital. 

The appointment went really well: Aedan's A1C (a blood test that shows a 90-day average blood/glucose reading) puts him in a non-diabetic range. This means that his blood sugar is very well controlled with the 5 mg dose of Glyburide. If we continue to maintain these levels, his chances of suffering the long-term effects of diabetes are basically the same as a non-diabetic. 

He still has high readings in the mornings, though, often followed by a crash 2 hours after he takes his pill. We decided to try splitting his dosage up into 3 times a day: a 1/2 pill with breakfast, 3/4 mid-afternoon, and 3/4 before bed. Today is day 3 of this new routine: Aedan adapts so easily, but of course it's taking me some getting used to. 

It means if we're going out in the afternoon, I have to have a syringe with the dissolved pill prepared with me, plus a snack to go along with it. The morning and evening doses have been tricky, too, because he still hasn't gotten back onto a normal sleep schedule, after our travels.

I'm grateful, though, every day, that it's only this we have to deal with. In comparison to what other families go through, it seems incredibly easy. We're lucky that his particular form of diabetes is recognized and easily managed.

While we're on the topic of Aedan...he's learning so much every day! It is such a joy to be able to facilitate that learning, and to watch him practice new skills.

I mentioned in this post that he enjoys "putting" things...well, his putting has gotten quite refined just lately! He's begun to stack blocks (rather than just knocking them down), and he enjoys playing with a set of nesting cups. He's also learned to fit objects onto a peg, like these wooden rings. 

In the last 2 days, I've noticed him walking backwards: this he does (slowly and carefully) with a huge grin on his face. He's quite the stair climber, too!

Lastly, his signing just blows me away. He signs for milk and more....he uses more as a general purpose "I want" sign: he'll sign "more" and then point to something he desires. He also signs "dog", by patting his chest. It should be his leg he's patting. I read that it's common for babies to learn this sign by patting a different part of the body at first. He also signs for books. Now we're working on "hot", "eat", "drink", and "outside". 

He's also picked up a hilarious shrug from me, when something or someone disappears.

A parcel with his winter gear has arrived at the post office: we're off to town to pick it up today. I can't wait to watch him play in the snow!

Home

Phew! We've just returned from 3 weeks of visiting family in Ontario, with a side trip to Vancouver, British Columbia, to visit with Aedan's doctors. I love love living in the Yukon, but getting in and out of this territory is a real ordeal!

But I will never complain about a chance to visit family.

It does my heart good to see Aedan playing with his grandparents, his aunties and uncles and cousins.
It does my body good to have a break from my own housework.
And it does my tummy good to savour the variety of foods we lack here in the North.

But it is always so good to finally come home! My feet were tired of walking on pavement, my eyes were tired of looking at endless tall buildings, and my ears were tired of the constant hum of a busy city.

It's lovely to look out the window and see only trees! Granted, the trees are now bare of leaves and covered in snow (whereas in Ontario, they were just beginning to burst into radiant autumn colour).

I missed the steady warmth of the wood stove, and the smell of baking bread. I missed the mountains and the quiet and even the cold!

And of course, I missed this blog, too! It's good to be back. I have lots of catching up to do!

Love letters from Toronto

Dear Blog,

I miss you terribly!

We are visiting family in Ontario right now. We'll be home in a week. I look forward to catching up with you then!

Love,

Bush Mama (in the big city)

xo